Work is absolutely killing me right now, so I apologize for being M.I.A.
-Touch Down There (my ZogSports touch football team) lost in the second round of playoffs this past weekend, putting an end to our undefeated season. Part of the reason we lost was because we were quite simply outplayed by the other team. But another big factor to our loss was that one of our best players wasn’t allowed to play. He got screwed because his name wasn’t listed on our official roster from the start of the season, and a technicality in the league rules prevented him from playing (I won’t go into why this rule is terrible - this post would get too long). In short, the only reason this rule even came into play was because he was a friend of the person enforcing the rule (I’ll call her S.U.Z.A.N.N.E for “Some of Us Zoggers Are Not Nice, Eh”). S.U.Z.A.N.N.E. had the roster and knew our player, and so the rule was enforced, whereas a hypothetical player on our team, who was also not on our roster but was using a fake name of someone who was, would have went unnoticed. Ordinarily, all of this wouldn’t really be worthy of a post, except that S.U.Z.A.N.N.E is a reader of this blog, and after our loss, she attempted to apologize for everything that went down, ending with “Don’t write about me…”
Oops. You caught me in the wrong week, babe.
[Update: Well, the shit hath hiteth the fan. Unfortunately, my stress level at work and a lack of time and sleep led to a quickly-written post that ended up not as light-hearted as intended. Check the comments - there's some pretty good reads down there...
Just to clarify, I really don't give a shit about this ordeal. It sucked at the time, but I'm over it. This post was not written to debate or be petty about the rule (see the sentence above that says "Ordinarily all of this wouldn't really be worthy of a post, except that..."). To answer some of the commenters, I do understand that rules are rules. Some are meant to protect the safety of players, some are meant to allow gender equality on the field, and some are meant to - well, I haven't quite figured out the purpose of that one rule. In any case, ITS NOT A BIG DEAL. Sure one of our guys had to sit around for a few hours, but at the end of the day (and season), we all had fun and gave some money to charity. And we'll do it again next year (though we'll pay a little more attention to the rules.)
This post was really (and I'll admit, poorly) written to poke gentle fun at S.U.Z.A.N.N.E. (By the way, how could you all take that lame-ass acronym I made seriously? I mean, I ended it with "eh". Do I look Canadian to you?) She told me not to write about her, so I did - a whole "nobody tells me what to do!" type thing. I would apologize for the (bad) humor being lost on some of you, but I won't. This blog apologizes to no one (see, more bad humor).
I hope she's not too upset (thankfully, her comment doesn't seem too filled with hate). I actually love the fact that she reads this thing because until last weekend, I had no clue who she was. One of the biggest joys of mine in doing this is meeting random people and finding out they read this crap. (By the way, general question for people that are reading this that I don't personally know... How did you end up here? Leave me a comment and tell me, but please don't call me a "whiny-ass baby boy" like one of today's commenters did, cause I'm not...I AM NOT....I AM NOOOOOOOOOT. STOP IT! I'M TELLING ON YOU!)
So, S.U.Z.A.N.N.E. (and the rest of you), please don't stop reading. This is fun. And time consuming. And now I have to get back to work. And so should you. Well, after you tell your friends to come here and read my blog and click on square-shaped links that were put on here by a big search engine company (Intentionally vague sentence because I don't think I'm supposed to actually say that. Damnit, I'm breaking rules again.) I could use the money. ZogSports is not cheap.]
-Bier was in town last weekend, leading to long nights filled with high levels of drinking. As a result of him being here, I also hung out with some other buddies from school who live in the city. I hardly ever see them because they are I-Bankers, and when not working, they are somewhat a part of the whole douchey I-Banker scene. But at least they admit it, as evidenced by a line delivered by one of them to a random girl at the bar on Friday.
“Yeah I’m a douche. But I’m rich.”
-The only thing getting me through the hellish tunnel that is this week is the bright light at the end, the Michigan-Ohio State game on Saturday, an event which I still consider to be underhyped.
Yeah I said it. Underhyped. Because any time spent by the media covering other sports is time not spent hyping this game.
NBA? Whoopty do, Ben left the Pistons, the Knicks still suck. There’s 70 games left, talk to me in January.
NFL? Its midseason. I think we can afford to take a week off from coverage, right?
NHL? You fucking kidding?
MLB? If I hear one more word about an arrogant Japanese player who requires teams to place contract bids just to even talk to him, I might stab someone. This is America’s favorite past-time?
College Basketball? I’ll let this one slide.
Women’s College Basketball? Do I even need to say something here?
That’s all I got for now. I likely won’t post until next week, so I apologize in advance.
Go Blue!
Email: me [at] amishshah [dot] com
15 responses so far ↓
The Ref // Nov 15, 2006 at 2:19 pm
Rules are rules bro. If you hadn’t broken them you would not be upset, would you? Last I check, you should have forfeited as soon as you tried to have some non-roster player play. Read page 4: http://www.zogsports.org/Footb.....s%20V7.pdf
Kevin // Nov 15, 2006 at 2:43 pm
Dude if you need more players next season let me know
Brotha // Nov 15, 2006 at 2:52 pm
Hard to compare not playing by the rules and technicalities. Or maybe it isn’t. To say that your team lost due to a “hitch”, “glitch” or “snafu” would be slightly exaggerated. Even more so, by blaming the enforcer(s) working to protect your capability to win your playoff game fairly. So while your choose to create acronyms, you’re just a L.O.S.E.R.
Stop Crying you BIG BABY // Nov 15, 2006 at 3:02 pm
In regards to your recent talk about Z Sports: First of all, what are u 5? Common guy, if you’ve been in the Z league as long as you say you have you know this is a rule. Second of all it’s NOT S.U.Z.A.N.N.E’s fault as you say, but your idiot captain who didn’t put you on the roster. If you should be angy or upset at anyone it is him/her. Ever here the term don’t shoot the messenger? Anyways, either way your team would have gotten spanked even if you did play, so whats the big deal?? If your serious enough to post negative blogs about people who ref in charity league sports, then obviously there is a deeper problem from with in, and you might want to seek some help you big panzie..
Who the F are you? // Nov 15, 2006 at 3:08 pm
Let’s just say I happen to roll up into a store you own. I want a cold refreshing drink like a Diet Coke perhaps, but I don’t want to pay for it. Would you let me slide because I am a faggot ass nigga who writes complaints on some no name website rather than just abiding by the rules and paying for the Diet Coke? F8ck you. Play fair.
supastah // Nov 15, 2006 at 3:13 pm
and may i remind everyone this is supposed to be a fun, social activity that raises money for charities. grousing about the rules enforcement or bitching about wins and losses is just assinine. grow up. move on. don’t hate the player, g. hate yourself for being such a petty, whiny-ass baby boy.
S.U.Z.A.N.N.E. // Nov 15, 2006 at 3:35 pm
I’m sorry buddy - rules are rules. I didnt even know the player in question was Ken until you flat out told me his name. I didnt seek you out to be an enforcer, the other team called him out and I had to check the rosters.
At the end of the day it’s all for charity and I hope your team had fun.
good luck next season.
KBo // Nov 15, 2006 at 6:07 pm
Actually, the other team called us out. Then, we beat them. Hehe
I think the point of the post was just to say it’s unfair that zog selectively enforces this rule. You could pick up some joe schmo hobo off the street and have him play and no one would care. But, if you pick up someone halfway through the season because you have roster players who don’t show and that person is friendly at the bar and mentions that he just joined this team, then you get called out on it.
Oh, and are all these comments from the same person? The poor grammar and spelling skills, lack of logical reasoning abilities, major rage issues, name calling, and bizarrely vehement love for zogsports suggest it might be…
ASP // Nov 15, 2006 at 7:07 pm
Here is our team’s (Touch Down There) major gripe:
In the FIRST game, we were called on a roster check because the other team knew Ken and suspected he might not have been on the roster. They ratted us out even though they he knew wasn’t a “ringer.” Fine. Whatever. We beat them. (Even more satisfying: it was BLATANTLY clear that the other team had a non-roster player on their team, but we aren’t snitches.)
In the SECOND game, the opposing team did not know a single person on our team. Ergo, they had no reason to call a roster check. They didn’t. When Ken tried to step on the field, the ref informed Ken that he wasn’t allowed to play. How did the ref know Ken wasn’t allowed to play? Because someone was a narc.
We had team members that didn’t shown up for the ENTIRE season. We had team members who wouldn’t attend happy hour.
Ken played in every game minus the scrimmage and season opener. At the Parlour after EACH game, he let the ZogSports groupie ho’s chase him and played flip cup with one hand behind his back. Ken earned his stripes and deserved to play in the playoffs.
Ken // Nov 15, 2006 at 7:24 pm
Hahaha, I think this is great… If anyone cares, I’m the guy who had to sit around for a few hours and watch my team play cause I technically wasn’t on the roster - but this is NOT my site and I had nothing to do with any of this blogging. So for all of you who posted comments directed at me - great job; I’m just reading them now for the first time because someone forwarded me the link. Incidentally, I think it’s hilarious that you rip Amish apart for blogging about Saturday and then jump right into the blogging party yourselves.
Anyway, let me know if any of you would like to reach me directly and we can talk about whatever you’d like outside this site. For what it’s worth, I think I/TDT handled everything pretty diplomatically on Saturday by not arguing with anyone, and having side conversations about the rules away from the games (with first the head official and then privately with Suzanne). Nobody on our team was trying to pull one over on anyone by bringing in some sort of playoff ringer. I played almost the entire season with this team and we made a mistake by never officially adding me on to the roster. Simple as that - a mistake which I ultimately paid for on Saturday. But again, if you disagree with how I handled the situation or would like to discuss further, just let me know.
Until then, much love to Zogs and TDT, and see y’all next season.
Amish // Nov 15, 2006 at 7:31 pm
KBo - that wasn’t really the point of the post (though the context was there), but I appreciate you (and Drew and Ken) expressing your view points.
No they didn’t come from the same person (I checked the stats).
Ken summed everything up pretty well. Let’s put this fucking thing to bed already.
Bier // Nov 16, 2006 at 11:14 am
I like that I lead to long nights of extensive drinking. Like you wouldn’t have done that by yourself…
I’d also like to add that Amish is one of the most easy going guys I know, and there is no way that he meant his post in any way other than a good-hearted poke. Now if this were me posting, it would be different. I’d be pissed. But that’s because I take stupid intramural sports way too seriously (yes, I was that guy in your gym class also)and have a tendency to get angry and run my mouth. In related news, I live in Detroit. Angry.
S.U.Z.A.N.N.E. // Nov 16, 2006 at 1:48 pm
my comment was lacking hate completely. I didnt mind that i was written about - i just wish it had been more of a “i met this really cool fun girl” comment then a “zog nazi-ish” comment.
i found your blog through a gawker link a while back and made you one of my favorites - most of the other posters found your blog because i forward the zog posts to the other zog workers.
So lets all move on - next season you will have all your players on the roster and it will be another happy zog year.
a fan // Nov 17, 2006 at 12:51 am
You commented on an entry at LSO. I clicked on it, ended up here, and am now addicted.
R
Megan // Nov 17, 2006 at 10:56 am
jesus, who knew zog football was so cut throat. anyways, I’m playing kickball next spring. Amish, you in????
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