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Fortune, my ass

February 28th, 2005 · 1 Comment

We ordered Chinese food today at work. This was my fortune cookie:

You are interested in public service.

Is it me, or is that NOT A FORTUNE? When the hell did fortune cookies stop being fortune cookies, and start being commentary on my personality? And who the fuck is making these whatever-they-are so mind-numbingly dull? “You are interested in public service.” No I’m not, you stupid excuse for a cookie! I’m well aware of what my interests are… I’m interested in a ton of money and hot chicks. And I don’t need you to write that down for me on a piece of paper. Write me a FORTUNE, like this:

You will come across a ton of money…and hot chicks

How hard is that? Honestly, if I saw a fortune like that, I’d order more Chinese food.

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